how did jk manage to write ootp and not come to the conclusion that the only career w any true meaning for harry james potter was as a goddamn professor at hogwarts like how do u write the da scenes and say “nah he’d want to be a wizard cop”
#but it would be so perfect??? #bc it would help normalize his life so much #like there would just be this generation of kids who are like #‘ugh who cares that he killed the dark lord he gAVE US HOMEWORK OVER BREAK’ #like the beginning of every year there would be the new first years who would freak out a little #but then it would calm down #and most of the students would literally forget #until like clockwork the fifth years would have their history of magic class on the second war #and they’d all show up to DADA looking a little awestruck and everyone would be extra quiet #and harry would give this kind of annoyed sigh—except it’s fake bc he TOTALLY knew this was coming #bc binns is a bro and he totally gives him a heads up every year #and harry wouldn’t have any lesson plans for the day and instead he would just sit at the front of the room and answer everyone’s questions #but otherwise everyone would just be like ‘professor potter!! i can’t get my patronus to work! help me!’ #and like they’d go home at the end of the year or for break and their parents—who ARE still starstruck by harry james potter #would pester their kids with questions#and the kids would just be like ‘merlin i don’t know?? potter’s such a huge dork you should hear him talk about proper wand movements’ #but they would all love him #and he would feel safe and normal and utterly accepted #AND I NEED THIS IN MY LIFE (via @cinematicnomad)
Not to mention it would be an ultimate Fuck You to Voldemort, who put a curse on the teaching position in the first place.
Like, Jo, I don’t want to tell you how to do your job, but COME ON
I already queued this but also, you do this, but still have Ginny become a famous Quidditch player. Imagine the first time Harry gets called “Ginny’s husband” before “the boy who lived” or “the chosen one.” Imagine how fucking pleased he’d be.
Imagine the first time a student comes up to him looking starry-eyed and Harry’s thinking “Oh no” because he doesn’t want to talk about Voldemort or the war but instead this little eleven year old is like “ARE YOU REALLY MARRIED TO WEASLEY FROM THE HOLLYHEAD HARPIES???!?? WHAT’S SHE LIKE?” and he’s like “oh thank god” because he could talk about Ginny all day.
SIRIUS FLIRTING WITH LITERALLY EVERY TEACHER TRYING (and failing) TO GET OUT OF DETENTION
He tried it with Dumbledore once and the man laughed so hard it almost worked, but then McGonagall came around the corner. Sirius brags until his dying day that he once seduced Dumbledore himself.
James never actually believes him until one day Sirius gives Dumbledore this huge dramatic wink and then Dumbledore winks back.
I have a headcanon that Lily, ironically, loved flowers and during fourth or fifth year James found out. So when he tried to woo Lily he would always have a bunch of flowers as well. Every week there would be a new type of flower (don’t even ask how much trouble he got into with Professor Sprout), roses, daffodils, daises, tulips, just about every flower you could possibly imagine.
This carried on until early sixth year, until one day Lily had received an angry letter from Petunia about how she was such a freak and how her boyfriend, Vernon didn’t want to come to the house anymore because she was so weird. Lily was absolutely heart broken, when James showed up with a bunch of petunias.
“Evans, I got you some flowers…” he said. At that point, Lily burst into tears and was violently sobbing. James was shocked because she’d never broken down before when he gave her flowers.
“Hey, hey, hey,” he said and he helped her back into the Common Room, where they sat down. “Why don’t you tell me what’s wrong?”
Lily really needed a friend right now and maybe, just maybe, Potter would understand. First she just talked and talked about her sister, but she realised how good James was at listening, so she kept talking about everything. The war, how scared she was, that Transfiguration test she was so sure she would fail. James listened like he’d never listened before, and when she was done he pulled her into a hug and told her everything would be okay.
And that was the day Potter and Evans became friends.
So I noticed this line in Prisoner of Azkaban and now I can’t stop thinking about how great it would be if Remus Lupin and Minerva McGonagall became good friends while Remus was teaching at Hogwarts, so here are some headcanons about that:
When they meet for the first time in 15 years, it breaks Minerva’s heart to think about the eager awkward boy she once knew and to look at the broken man with the tired eyes he has become. She notices how much Remus has aged since she last saw him.
For Remus, being back at Hogwarts hurts like hell. As he gives McGonagall an unconvincing smile, he can’t stop thinking of his school days and of how much has changed.
“Hello, Professor. It’s been a long time,“ Remus says slowly.
McGonagall pulls Remus into a hug. He is stiff but doesn’t pull away.
Remus at first being reluctant to talk to any of the other teachers much because he doesn’t feel he belongs there and he’s kind of lost the will to connect with people.
McGonagall making sure that Remus is involved in every staff room conversation
McGonagall adjusting to the strangeness of seeing Remus on his own, not with three other grinning boys
McGonagall joking with Remus about pranks he pulled at school and Remus explaining how they were done
McGonagall correcting Remus each time he called her ‘Professor’ rather than Minerva
Remus and Minerva staying up late in the staff room drinking tea and talking about complex magical theory
Remus asking Minerva “Tell me about James and Lily’s boy, tell me all about Harry”
Minerva telling Remus about Harry’s skill at Quidditch, about how he fought a troll in his first year, how he has two inseparable friends, how last year he secretly brewed Polyjuice Potion and defeated a Basilisk…
Remus confiding in Minerva about how strange he feels when he looks Harry “He’s the spit of James… but Lily’s eyes… I held him as a baby… I heard him speak his first words… and now he doesn’t know me at all… I never would have thought I’d be a stranger to James’ son”
Minerva understands because sometimes she sees James when she looks at Harry
Minerva and Remus chatting about their students’ progress, especially Harry’s
Minerva changing the subject or distracting Remus whenever Sirius Black is mentioned in the staff room because she sees the pain those conversations cause Remus.
Minerva defending Remus whenever she hears other teachers muttering about how it isn’t safe to have a werewolf teaching students
Minerva making sure that she keeps track of the lunar calendar and that gives Remus space when the full moon is approaching
One night when he is curled up in pain in his office on the night of the full moon, Remus is surprised and comforted when a cat with spectacle markings around its eyes finds its way in. The cat sits with him every full moon after that.
When Remus resigns, Minerva comes into his office and asks “Are you sure about this? If you want to stay, I will do everything I can…” but Remus just shakes his head. “Well- look after yourself,” Minerva says like it’s an order.
Meg- So, me and @askwhathasthiscometo has decided that since people say we’re BASICALLY twins, we decided to make Marlene have a twin, Malene. These are some headcanons for them.
Marlene&Malene twin headcanons.
-Malene is 10 minutes older, and NEVER lets Marlene forget it. (“I’m Malene. This is my little sister, Marlene.” “MERLIN’S BEARD YOU’RE OLDER BY TEN MINUTES. IM TALER THAN YOU ARE ANYWAYS.”)
-They get along best out of all their siblings, other than Marlene and Gabe.
-Being the only two girls in the family, other than their mum, they learned how to get what they wanted very quickly.
-They fight quite often, like sisters normally do. (“MALENE YOU GIT YOU STOLE MY JUMPER!” “IT WAS MY JUMPER IN THE FIRST PLACE!”)
-They love each other like crazy, but won’t hesitate to murder the other if needed.
-“IF YOU COME OUT OF THE DORM ROOM WEARING THE SAME THING AS ME AGAIN I SWEAR!”
-“IF YOU COME OUT OF THE ROOM WEARING MY CLOTHES I SWEAR I WILL MURDER!”
-While Malene never had much of an interest in Quidditch, she still supports her sister at every game, along with the rest of her siblings. (“Did you see that score?! That was incredible.” “Huh? Oh, yeah. Go team. Do the thing, win the points.”)
-Even though she loves her sister more than life itself, Marlene still has a rather hard time coming out to her. She’s seen plenty of people who came out that ended up being kicked out and shunned by their own family, and she’s not sure if she can handle that. When she finally tells her sister that she’s dating Dorcas, however, Malene isn’t pissed about her dating a girl. She’s pissed because it had taken Marlene so long to ask the girl out. (“Malene… I’m dating Dorcas…” “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!” “Malene, I-” “DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS?! I THOUGHT I WOULD DIE BEFIRE YOU TWO GOT TOGETHER.” “Wait, you’re okay with this?” “Marly, our brother is more gay than a rainbow. Did you really think I wouldn’t accept you? If you did, you’re an idiot.”)
-Although many muggles call it a joke, they truly are telepathic with each other. We’ll sort of. While they may not be able to have conversations through their minds or be able to PERFECTLY read the others thoughts, they can generally tell what the other is thinking, and they are both empathetic with the other. If one of them is upset, they both are. If one of them gets hurt, the other feels it.
-After Gabe dies, Marlene shuts down completely, not speaking and barely eating. So, due to the empathy the two have, Malene doesn’t either. The two stay in their beds all day, Malene only leaving to bring back food for the both of them.
((-and if this isn’t the best thing ever…??? Malene is a european name fyi
Meg, you’re just bloody brilliant! Let’s do this!!))
askwhathasthiscometo 